Finding a perspective

Sorry for the silence. I have used some extra time to gather my thoughts about the current situation, and it took a while. Lucky to live in this great country where there are almost endless possibilities to find peace and nature, I managed to take long walks by myself and find something to say.

As you are already reading too many news, there is no point in going over any of the facts of what is happening. It is clear that the western world is in a crisis which has not happened before during the lifetime of many of us now in the best phase of our lives. We are all in a shock, afraid, and at least I feel quite helpless, when trying to think how to help the situation. I am not a trained physician, I barely can take care of myself, so what to think when there is a mixed message from the scientists, doctors, authorities and media? All I can do is try to stay calm, and put some perspective into this.

Us living in the western world take many things for granted. Most of us hold jobs or study rights (so we have some income either from our earnings or from the government - or bank loan, which we pay back after finishing studies and going to work). Most of us have a rather decent standard of living: we may even have luxuries such as getting groceries whenever and cook what we feel like, have interesting hobbies in our free time (perhaps some exotic or up-to date trendy sport), friends we meet regularly, and other things that we take for granted.

During a crisis like this, suddenly we realize that we can no longer continue doing everything the way we used to. It feels like in prison to stay at home, being afraid for your loved ones and worrying whether the economy will ever return to normal. This is definitely something that feels like a nightmare. I bet none of us could have imagined this being actually reality.

There is no way I can say that this is positive. (This is absolutely horrible, and I am scared as hell!). But to be able to understand what is happening, I have to try to put some perspective into this. Perhaps there are still things that make my life worth living, although I cannot get everything ready on my plate I used to be able to, or I cannot go to my favorite national park because of the limitations. Maybe this is the time to think what are the most meaningful things in our lives, and put some priorities into place.

For example, I realized that I end up having some stupid fights with my family. I stopped doing that, and all of a sudden there is more energy to the more important things. Also, when I need to keep the distance, I started calling more people that I had not called in ages. That was so rewarding! Also, I thought, how could I help those who are struggling, so I cooked or helped in some other way, and I felt great. In many ways my life has become more meaningful than before. And the funny thing is that I do not miss going shopping for clothes, or I do not really care if my hair looks messy cause I have not been to hair dresser.

After the realization that how many wonderful people there are in my life, that I truly care about, I feel there is actual sense into being alive and working hard. The whole point, perhaps, is to make each other happy, not just to struggle with the idea that why am I not constantly happy or satisfied.

I truly hope this situation will pass as fast as it started, and our loved ones will be ok. Let's act smart, listen to the authorities, focus on our jobs and routines, and let's build a better world when we come out of this terrible nightmare.

Need for a change

I was lucky to be raised by parents having down-to-earth values. As kids, me and my sister would have a freedom to explore our imagination. We would play in the woods learning to respect every tree branch and rock on your yard. We would create stories which we would act out as plays to our friends on birthday parties that my mum organized. We took violin and piano lessons and riding lessons from very early age. Our parents did everything to allow us to learn whatever we would want to, and it felt like a dream environment to grow up. If I ever have children, I would like to recreate all that freedom of feeling and exploring anything imaginable.

Growing up in a relaxed and stimulating environment also made me aware of how privileged we were early on. As a pre-teen, I was well aware of the famine in Africa so I would want to help those kids, I acknowledged the impact of good behavior on creating a good environment to my class mates in primary school, and helping those in need became an essential part of me since those times. I remember also my mother inviting anyone in need to our home, and we would keep them company and offer food if somebody experienced a difficult time at home. These ideologies are still a part of me, and I believe I should take responsibility of what is going on around me.

I picked a profession in which I would have the opportunity to do good things even in the larger context. After graduating high school with excellent grades I moved to Canada (I wanted to become international already in my teens, as I thought that the language of science should guide me throughout my career), where I completed a Specialization in Biology degree. I worked super hard, and managed to get my first publication from my Bachelor thesis, around the age of 20. When moving back to Finland, to apply my new skills, I first worked as a research assistant. Soon after I started a new type of Biology degree, in Ecology and Evolutionary Biology. With granted funding I did my Masters’ early on, and published another article. Soon after graduation I got my first job as a researcher, which was in marine protection. I loved it – and I could finally make a difference for real. I worked super hard and hopefully through some of my projects the Baltic Sea is a little bit cleaner today.

Slowly, while I was busy working, I started to realize the actual dimensions of challenges in the working life and research. It started to strike me slowly, first just some people saying sometimes they'd have trouble sleeping at night or they had to go to doctor due to extremely high stress levels. Poor people, I thought. Luckily I would not have to go through this. The more time passed, the more aware I started becoming of the troubles faced by the good hearted and hard-working people with extremely high skill level. Why this is, is not a simple issue. However, I am pretty sure competition is a large factor.

What happens in nature when a species is competing for a tiny amount of resources? They get excluded (a lesson from an elementary Ecology book). In working life, of course, it is more subtle. But what it comes down to is that the competition for the very limited funding is huge – you need to spend your evenings and weekends after super intense working days to apply for grants to be able to continue working, and if you are lucky and are admitted the grant, you will need to spend your evenings and weekends to report every detail of your projects to the funding institute. In a dream world, one would need to eat and sleep at some point, but if you want to build a good career, you start to save time from every bit you can. The first to go is hobbies and dreams of what you may have, for example; having a family must wait. Giving such a huge thing up hurts, but it is worth it – eventually the world is becoming a bit better, and there will be time for these dreams later on, right? And who would want to be left without a job. That is only for losers, right, so better keep applying.

The truth I was facing already that ten years ago, when this happened, is finally today hitting me hard. I recently realized that having set aside my dreams all the way long, has caused me to end up in a state of a panic. What did I end up with? None of those things I dreamt of, and yep, I am soon turning 40. About a half of my life has passed just trying to make it somehow, I have not lived it at its fullest. For example, I have not fought for the things I essentially find important – love, relationships and family. In fact, I have given it all up. Realizing this makes me feel angry, helpless and lost. I suppose this is something termed as “burn out” in common terms. 

If it was only me, it would not be that bad. I just go to the doctor, get some pills, and would be alright in a bit. But what strikes me is that it is not only me.

I wanted to share the fears and thoughts in relation to my career in a couple of Facebook groups for academics and well-educated people. The number of responses from people going through the exact same thoughts or feelings was unimaginable. In less than 20 minutes, my wall was filled with comments from like-minded people. There were so many stories that they would not fit on the page in that time. A single parent shared a heart-breaking story of just barely making it from day to day with the low pay of her job and moving between countries regularly. Women in their 40s told how they gave up their dream of trying to rehearse their dream profession, and were left without a job eventually anyway (the feeling of their frustration was loud and clear). A mother of a young baby explained she had somehow managed to complete her studies but in the end was so out of energy that she could not go on working anymore and has given hope of returning to university. On my facebook wall, there were innumerable messages, some directly to me in person, reinforcing that a countless number of people are in a situation where there seems to be no way out. Trying to fulfill the impossible challenges of the surrounding society.

It took me a while to realize how badly we have gone wrong here. First, let's blame the society: The cuts to the research funding are painfully showing, not only in the reduction of the babies born today, but as mental health issues that are more wide-spread than ever before. People are forced to make rushed choices to just get food to table – and yes, these are the same people who were raised the same way I was. They (and I) were raised to build a better planet, better future and fulfill own dreams while doing this. But the end result is the opposite of this: we are all out of energy, in despair and in a state of hopelessness.

Evidently, this has to stop. It is now time that we can no longer let this happen to us. We need to build ourselves lives; wee need jobs we know will be there still tomorrow (if we do not finish our extra work at midnight); we need to feel that social structures will sustain even if we are sometimes tired; and the system needs to change.At least I refuse to live in a country in which I would not even want to raise a child.

Before I lose every bit of my creativity, energy and knowledge, let this blog writing be the first step in change towards better.

How to keep dreaming and profiting from it

This week I had a day when a reviewer threw cold water to my back (saying that the research plan of my article was completely wrong and that I should redo the study with a completely different setup), a conference abstract which was supposed to be a formality got rejected, and I realized that the projects planned will never be ready on time. I felt out of energy and like a failure. Days like this happen to all of us, but at a moment like this, it is good to reflect how to keep calm.

I am the type of person who has sacrificed a lot for career (for example, I do not have a family, because I never felt like I would have enough time and would not want to do it half-way) so how could I still feel accomplished and good about myself? Of course, the first thing you can do is call a friend. This approach is sure to work – at least momentarily – just to let it all out and have someone close to you listen to you and support you. So it is worth making the use of!

In the long run, however, it is good to have other strategies as well. Career planning is a great way to set yourself on the map. I found some great tools online, that are available to all. I warmly recommend taking the free personality test to map your strengths and weaknesses. This was very useful for me, as I often find myself wondering why I get upset at work. It turned out that I have sometimes ended up in the wrong environment. I found out which pattern I have followed and what to do to avoid it. Instead of quietly trying to solve my own problems and deal with difficulties alone, to me the best strategy is teaming up with colleagues and share knowledge. This way of working makes me achieve more, feel more efficient, and this brings the feeling of ease. Work does not have to be difficult all the time!

Other strategies I discovered to bring satisfaction to daily routines, was a reality check with myself. I clarified (with a pencil and sheet of paper) my goals, my values and my beliefs that have made me select my current career path. That being visualized, I asked myself I where I want to be, and what actions should I take to get there. I found out that I want things that I currently have not let myself a permission to have. Quite a feeling to discover something like that. It is actually quite a relief to realize that it is not, in fact, the others to blame for the bad mood, but that there is a lot you can do yourself to get in a better mood.

So, this week my suggestion to all of you is, despite in what career stage you are, to take a moment to really get to know what kind of worker you are. Five minutes of honest self-reflection every day can improve your chances of success, make you feel like you are on the right track and magically, life seems so much better.

Let’s be brave and let’s dream big!

Here are some links I found useful:

https://www.reed.co.uk/career-advice/how-to-make-a-career-plan/

https://www.16personalities.com/

Where has creativity gone – the dilemma of the xennials

The terms imagination, creativity and innovation have separate definitions. Imagination is the capability of the mind to structure new ideas, creativity is applying imagination, and innovation is the use of creativity for a cause. To someone wanting a career filled with creativity, understanding all these processes is important. Yet, imagination, creativity and innovation may not always be recognizable within ourselves. This makes it difficult to use of them in our everyday life. In this blog text I aim to define the reasons why this is, and to propose how we could all make use of our hiding capabilities.

Imagine an ideal life path: you end up in college at 18, you graduate on time, find a partner, enroll to a well-paying and interesting permanent job, get married, start practicing trendy hobbies, get married and have children. You proceed in your career through a senior position to become a respected leader in your field, while you watch your family excelling at your side (children in great schools getting all scholarships and eventually following your footsteps). During this time your parents are enjoying their retirement days. A nice image, I would say. But how many of us have led this type of life? At least in my circle of friends, I must say not everyone had it so smooth, more often quite the opposite.

Building a set of images of a life one should accomplish is dangerous. Comparing yourself to such an unreal person, made up of the impressions you have of people presenting their best sides on Facebook, is – I claim – one of the main reasons why we are unhappy and lack creativity. We waste most of our time trying to match to an ideal, which is not possible to achieve, and get disappointed with ourselves failing to do so. Why do we do this? Instead of following a fulfilling life path, we purposefully seem to make ourselves miserable. I believe the answer is simple: we try too hard to be perfect.

Let’s face it. Today’s job market is completely different from those days when our parents graduated. Those days, most people with any degree were guaranteed a permanent job and secure pension. The path of life described above was a standard achieved by many those days. Nowadays, when my generation is approaching 40, we feel as if we failed it all. We do not gain permanent jobs. Not all of us succeed to have children. Also, not all of us enjoy a house without a mortgage. Comparing these “pitfalls” in your life to the description above makes it look as if we failed. The truth is, however, that while we are required to re-educate ourselves voluntarily to keep up with the pace of technological changes, while holding fulltime jobs (some feeding the children or paying our debt), we are also expected to look happy on the outside. As my aunt might say “In our days, when being young, we would not complain. We would just do it”. This creates a huge generation gap. The world is completely different than what it was about 40 years ago.

So, what then, should we think of all this? I believe we should give ourselves a break. I do not think it will change how we are seen by our parents’ generation; the trick is to change how we see ourselves. It is not our fault that there are no permanent jobs out there or that stable career paths do not exist. Also, we should not feel guilty that not all of us can have children or afford a big house. It is fine, that we search for our identity still in our 30s and wonder what job would suit us. It is also not a failure that we do not receive pension when we retire.

We try just as hard as everyone else have tried before us. It is ok not to be perfect.